My Sadie, here I am facing the first birthday without you since I was 24. Oh how I wish you were here. All I have now is precious memories of the life we shared and a deep ache in my heart for you that won’t seem to go away.
Remember how you used to follow me around like the sun was shining out of my butt?
Remember when you would stand at the back door surveying the yard and I would tell you that was your yard, your kingdom and you ruled it all?
Remember how you would stand outside while daddy mowed the lawn around you, oblivious to the fact that anything in the world could hurt you?
Remember when you would hang outside with me while I washed the cars and I’d invariably end up spraying your little furry butt by accident?
Remember when we would sit together outside at night, you and me alone, and I’d run up to you and hug out of nowhere, just because you deserved it?
Remember all the car rides we took together, you sitting in the passenger seat, drooling all over yourself, my little car buddy?
Remember when you were little and I would take you to the dog run and you wouldn’t want to play with the other dogs, you would just stand there barking at me?
Remember how I would kiss off the little drop of water from your mouth after you drank, calling it the most delicious little water lip in the world?
Remember how I would wipe off your mouth after feeding you then you would go dig up your bed like a crazy dog?
Remember the towel game we used to play after I’d dry you after coming in from the rain, how you would beat up the towel?
Remember all our walks together, on the streets of nyc and in the mountains and at the shore?
Remember 9/11, when everyone was going crazy and I carried you into the deli to pick up supplies, not wanting to leave you tied up outside in that insanity?
Remember your little doggie friends, like the one with the charming habit of drinking your pee pee?
Remember how I used to give you the umbrella to hold as we walked down our street, and you would prance along happy as can be with the job you had been given?
Remember that one night you got out and I panicked, only to find you calmly sniffing around a couple of doors away?
Remember how you used to sleep curled up on the cold floor by the toilet looking so uncomfortable but obviously loving that spot?
Remember the pile of dirty clothes I used to leave on the floor for you that was always your favorite bed?
Remember how I adored every little thing about you, from your shiny little lip to the soft fur around the pads of your feet to your fluffy tail, and constantly told you about it?
Remember how I would sit on the floor with you and kiss your little hands and then lay my forehead on them?
Remember that last night when you were sick and I slept on the floor next to you but you didn’t feel good so we stayed outside in the cold for hours?
Remember how much I love you?
Like I always told you, I love you all the way, I love you with my whole heart, I love you forever my little angel.
Thank you for being my friend for so long. I am blessed to have had the privilege of knowing you and caring for you.